Cool as Cucumber

Why does it seem that every day the outcome of  yet more medical research, much of it contradictory, is reported by the media?

Today I learnt that overweight people are less likely to succumb to dementia as early as their slimmer counterparts. However, and before I give up on the gym and frequent Burger King instead, I do have to consider the fact that obesity is likely to lead to heart and other problems. Moreover it was only earlier this week that we were told that there is a genetic link between short height and coronary artery disease, coupled with high cholesterol, raised blood-pressure and the inevitable risk of stroke.

So as someone who only just extends to 5 feet and 2 inches (1.57 metres) when fully stretched, do I cut back on cake and risk dementia instead?

Of course this all had to follow an evening at the Civic Theatre in Darlington last night to see "Grumpy Old Women," and from which I encountered the amazing statistic that, as they get older, women spend 26 hours of every 24 hour day worrying.

You will discern that this morning I was in an inevitable state of anxious fretting trying to resolve the health conundrum. How long will it be before my heart gives up? Is it already showing signs of disease? Could it be enlarged? Could it even have stopped beating without me even noticing? Should I be changing my diet, and if so in what way? Do I go to the gym more or less often?

All of these thoughts were occupying my mind as I drove along one of the narrow lanes that leads out of the village. Suddenly there was a flash of white to my left as a young deer leapt out onto the road in front of my car. I slammed down the clutch and brake in an emergency stop and avoided hitting it by inches. My hand went to my chest: there was no perceptible reaction on the left side; no skipped or racing heartbeat, not even a flutter.

Cool as a cucumber, I drove on, confident that my heart is sound and strong.....for the moment!